#HoProblems

by Paula

Chick flicks? Big fan. Spent the afternoon watching Hitch.

Man is insecure. Man has baggage. Man falls in love with woman DESPITE her flaws. Man temporarily loses woman. Man realizes his mistake. Man chases after woman. Bada bing, bada boom. Happy Ending. Oh, and Man has a best friend who simultaneously gets the girl. She is obviously way out of his league.

If only life were that simple.

My romantic comedy:

• Would star Jamie Chung… as me, of course! She’ll be the skinnier, way prettier version. Reality is already skewed to begin with.
• I’d have a career like Elle’s (Legally Blonde, but not that blonde). I’ll be pursuing a profession that seems effortless to the ordinary person. Little do you know that in all honesty, I work my ass off.
• Somehow, I’d be the perfect combination between Meredith Gray and Christina Yang.
• No, I have not decided what the profession would be.
• My love interest would be some dashing fellow like Will Smith or Josh Duhamel or Daniel Dae Kim. He’s clearly smart.
• Some “unfortunate” accident happens—the narrative hook. Yes, it ends with a resolution.
• Happily ever after.

The feminist in me wants you to know that I also find the story above extremely repulsive. Psh, happily-ever-afters don’t end with finding the man—they end with high-powered careers!

Ugh, so torn.